Be a Good Friend to Your Husband

Our women's bible study had a wedding shower for a lady in our group. And the leader of the study asked us to give her some wisdom.

When she had said this, the first thing that came to my mind was be a good friend. But what does that look like? There were things going through my mind and I came up with ten. 

1. Pray for him
Pray that your man will be a man after God's own heart. He will grow and fruit will bear in his life.

2. Let him know you will walk through fire with him
Sometimes things will get hard in your marriage and difficult decisions will be made. If he knows you support him, it will encourage him to press forward.

3. Let him know he is Superman
In year one or two of marriage, we will have sweet things to say. But, at times, we can forget to encourage him because we are busy or we have a honey do list for him that is endless. We need to take the time to remind them that they our are superheros.

4. Encourage him
Let him know how much you love and our proud of him. Those words can go a long way for a man. We need to be women that build our houses up and not tear them down because our words can make or break our spouses. Our words need to be seasoned with grace.

5. Let him lead, and let him fall
This is a hard one because, if you're like me, you like to control things. However, our pastor said it well. "Ladies, you got to let us lead, and you have to let us fall." Ouch! That's not what I want to hear until a friend told me about her parents. Her dad wanted to start a business and her mother thought it was a bad idea. Finally, she let him do it and they ended up losing everything. But my friend told me her dad wouldn't be the humble man he is today if that hadn't happened.

Yes, we should confront sin but we also have to remember God is in control and we have to let the Lord work in their hearts in His time and His way. We are not the Holy Spirit.

6. You're not his momma, mummy, mom, mum, ma
You're his wife, lover, and friend.

7. Intimacy
I think sex is important to a man. And there are some wives that love it and others that don't. If it is something you don't love, I would encourage you to ask the Lord for help. I was taught it was nasty and horrible and that mindset transferred  to my marriage. Thankfully, the Lord helped me through my wrong view and allowed me to show intimacy to my husband. As a reminder though, we need to teach our spouses that timing is everything. :)

8. Hold hands
I love when I see older couples holding hands and loving each other. It is such a sweet moment and very encouraging to my own heart. As younger women, we need to do the same even when we may be upset with him. It may be hard but it speaks volumes.

9. Be quick to forgive and quick to ask forgiveness
This can be hard one but we really want to clothe ourselves in humility. And learn to walk humbly with the Saviour because pride will kill a friendship.

10. Pray
Keep praying for him. Pray that he will do things for you and the family because those are good things to pray for. However, the most important thing is to pray that his heart is inclined to Christ. That Christ is and will be his first love. Byron and Robin Yawn said this in their book What Every Woman Wishes Her Father Had Told Her:

"In a mysterious way, consistent with the rest of  Christianity, she does not need him to pay more attention to her, but to Christ more desperately. This prayerful desire honors God, demonstrates respect for her husband, and keeps the focus off of self. But reciprocally, an increased devotion to the risen Lord in him results in an increased devotion to her."

I'm sure I'm repeating what many of you already know. But I know I need to remind myself about this on a daily basis. I love and adore my husband and I want him to know it all the time through my actions and speech.

May we pray for our spouses faithfully and may we saturate ourselves in the word daily. And let us watch as the Lord changes not only our husbands but us into the image of our sweet Saviour.

Fall Favourites

This is where I would love to be. With a pencil in my hand and notebook so I could write. There is something special about fall. The cool air, the smell of the leaves, the scent of warm cider, and the autumn spices that linger in a coffee shop.

I love this season but living in southern California you don’t get that fally feel. Instead, it’s in the nineties and the palm trees don’t seem to take on the same beauty as maple leaves changing. But you can find some places where the leaves are raining down golden colours that make my heart happy.

So here are some of my favourite (Yes, I’m a Canadian exiled to California J)  things about fall:

·         Soft scarves

·         Apple cider with whipped cream on top.

·         Running

·         Banana Bread

·         I hate coffee so I’ll take the candy. I prefer Gummy Bears but I guess that isn’t a fall thing.

·         When it is cool outside, I love the scent of the leaves and rain.

·         Canadian and American Thanksgiving.

·         It’s hot here. 

And as I always remind myself the best place to be is at the foot of the cross. 

The Only Saviour: He's Better Than Idols Isaiah 43:8-13

The people of Israel were a mess. They had forgotten their true love and raced toward things made by man and bowed down to them. Yet God is patient, kind, and merciful. He wants them to come back to Him because He has called them by name. They belong to Him. He reminds them of what He has done for them and who He is. There is no one like Him.

He challenges the idolaters to appear in defense of their idols. They all needed to gather and proclaim what things they have done. The miracles they have performed and the hearts they have changed. If these idols are their “savior”, then let them speak and proclaim their glory.

But they can’t.

These are dead gods. The people loved them. These gods were their delight, joy, and praise because they consumed their thoughts and actions. They became like them.

These gods can’t save out of temporal trouble or save them from everlasting salvation.
Only one can do this. Only one can save. Only one can draw us to Himself.

That is the Lord. And He makes His case in such a way that you can’t help but stand in awe and worship.

“I, I am the LORD, and besides me there is no savior.” Isaiah 43:11

The only one that can save us is Christ. He is living. And we as His witnesses know of the power of His grace, the sweetness of His words that comfort us, the discipline of His sword that makes us more like Him, the kind care of His providence, the truth of His promises, and the love of His Son that He would send Him to earth to save us from the vice grip of sin.

However, we can point our fingers at the people of Israel and wonder how they could love something made of wood or gold. We need to examine our own hearts and see the idols pressed upon our hearts: worry, fear, jealousy, anger, discontent, pride, bitterness. We can so easily become like them and slowly turn away from our first love.

May we ask the Lord to search our hearts and remove the idols that have captured our hearts. May we love Him more today than yesterday so we can give an account of what He has done in our lives, so we can lead others to know and believe His power, truth, and love.

Behold our great God. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gqrli3Lkf58

The Only Saviour: Fear Not

Reading Isaiah 43, points us to the only Saviour and only true God. However, in the previous chapter, the Israelites wanted other gods to save them and they ignored God’s words. They refused to listen to the living God and listened to gods that had no ears to hear, eyes to see, or tongues to speak. They refused to listen and submit to Him. They wanted to do things their own way. They let self-rule in their hearts instead of letting the Lord rule.

            

            The Israelites forgot their first love. Jehovah.

However, He doesn’t toss them aside but brings them comfort and consolation. The people of Israel’s lives parallel our own and through these first seven verses, we see His love for His people and us too.

The Lord has created, redeemed, and called us by name and with this knowledge and truth that will never change, there is no need to fear because we belong to Him and we are precious in His sight. When we go through joys or trials, He is walking with us. He is the one holding our hand to the very end.

For I, the LORD your God, hold your right hand; it is I who say to you, “Fear not, I am the one who helps you.”

If we know this, why do we fear? We take our eyes off the Saviour, we take our hands out of His word, and we take our steps away from the truth.

We often say, “I trust you God, but …” We can fill in the blanks. I trust you God, but I’m scared. I trust you God, but I’m lonely. Worried. Angry. Bitter. Jealous. Discontent. When we say this, we doubt the one who created us. We doubt the one who saved us and we doubt the one that has called us by name. It is sin and we need to repent.

But there is hope. The Lord is helping and refining us to be more like Him. He is teaching us to walk by faith and not by sight. He is showing us that He is better than anything this world has to offer. He is reminding us that our home is with Him. This is why it is so important to spend time with the Lord. To sit at the foot of the cross and see what He has to say through the pages of scripture. His word will calm our souls. He will teach us to fix our eyes on Him and not ourselves.

He knows our needs, our circumstances, our obligations, our temptations, our herculean difficulties, and our subtle sins. He isn’t a distant and cold god but a close and personal one that thinks of us often. We belong to Him and He purchased us with the blood of Christ. We are among his precious jewels and redeemed children.

We have a great high priest who can sympathize with us. This should make us praise Him because we can be confident to know that He will never abandon His people.

May we thank the Lord that He is working in us and rooting the sin out of our hearts. May we let His word strengthen our souls as we walk in this world. And may we never forget that He redeemed us, called us by name, formed us, created us, and loves us.

Here is a great song. Psalm 62 Song by Aaron Keyes